mv04_誰も知らない (nobody knows)
title: 誰も知らない (nobody knows)
director: 是 枝 裕 和 kore-eda hirokazu
main cast: yagira yuya (akira), kitaura ayu (kyoko), kimura hiei (shigeru), shimizu momoko (yuki)
first movie of the year! i think. can't find my movie stub for the incredibles.. finally i've watched a movie! and i can truthfully say that i love this movie. and i think i'm ready to commit to hailing kore-eda as my favorite director!
this is kore-eda's fourth feature film. but it's only the second film of his that i've caught. the first one (i'd watched) was afterlife. that, was another movie that i love. i've been wanting to get the dvd so i can rewatch it and remember why i love the film (if you've read my previous movie ramblings you should know by now that i'm incredibly senile even when it comes to movies i love). it's been.. at least five years since afterlife i think. ok, more about afterlife when i get the dvd.
i haven't been catching a lot of movies lately. think it's the limited income thing. mainly two reasons prodded me into action (finally)
- the male lead of nobody, beat tony leung (one of my weak spots), to become the best actor at 2004 cannes film festival. thing is, he was 14. this led my delicious tony to sprout some sore words.. intriguing..
- it was a film by kore-eda. and i loved afterlife. maybe i'll enjoy this too.
and i am so so so glad i watched it.
the film was based on a true life story. it was some what documentary-like in nature, but not completely i think (missed the disclaimer, but only the disclaimer coz i was late. thank goodness for trailers before movies..) the event that led us to this beautiful film happened in 1988 and was known then as the "Affair of the Four Abandoned Children of Nishi-Sugamo". four children, who were birthed by different fathers were abandoned by their mother. they didn't go to school and were legally non-existent in the world as their births were not declared. three of whom had to live literally like non-existent beings, within the confines of a small two-room apartment, not allowed to step out of the house, in fear of getting chased away by the landlord.
at first i thought it might be a melodramatic film since it was based on such a sensationalising event. but kore-eda handled it in a somewhat detached and reticent way rather than exaggerate the potential drama from underlying issues and themes. he chose to show akira's strength, the children's resilience and tenacity to continue living, to live together, the love among the siblings rather than try to judge the actions of their mother.
the film showed how tough life can be but didn't dwell on the arduousness of it all. the children have to deal with broken promises, forgotten birthdays, unpaid bills and thus no water/electricity/gas supply, they had to deal with so much all by themselves, it made me aware of how fortunate i am to have my parents. yet despite all these difficulties, they can still find joy. from a special trip out, from growing wild seeds, from finding change from the pay phone.
yet despite their fortitude, kore-eda doesn't want us to forget that they are but children in need of love and care. they crave for friends, they enjoy toys and games, they are children who are forced to face the world rather prematurely. i don't really think it's a film that will caused audience's tears to pour rather it tugs one's heartstrings gently and doggedly. tears welled up at some points of the film, but i never really felt so utterly saddened that my tears flowed. coz there was always their stalwartness. there's always that bit of optimism in the air.
yagira yuya touched me. i think that kinda means his acting is good? (yes, i have yet to figure out what good acting is. i'm a gullible person. i don't really think i'm that good a judge of anyone's acting) i have to admit i managed to last 2046 partly due to tony's charisma.
nobody was 141 minutes long. i checked my watch a couple of times but it was only coz i'd wanted to use the loo. i don't know what kept me engaged. it could be the soundtrack. the appropriate use and omission of sounds. the directing i think played a great role. and the cast.
the cast were first-timers but i think they all did a brilliant job. their performance was simply heartrending. and i think yagira deserved to be named best actor at cannes.
well, if you could. you should watch this film. it's a quiet film that leaves an indelible mark.
control!! + debit card inspired gibberish
well, i've finally deleted one of my old blogs. after i've transferred some old entries here. some of them are untitled as of yet.. wonder if i'll ever get down to it.
but it feels kinda good. like the way i felt after throwing away a pair of pants, just the night before. (the zipper died) it almost feels like i'm getting a little control over my life.
wishing i've a chinese programme now. there's just some stuff that i can phrase in mandarin but not in english. that's partly why i still listen to chinese pop. because it's amazing what meaning a few words can hold. the layers of meaning. the nuances. man, i really like that language.
anyway back to the control over my life. there's some lingering? (bu4 she3) feeling. i can't really bear to say goodbye to things. but i guess it's also like a resolution i've decided on upon my birthday, to simplify my life. talking about resolutions, i was just bitching about someone i don't really like today again. damn.
received my new debit card today. finally i own a debit card that does not have the smart card chip. so how do we tell the difference between a debit card and a credit card now?
but it hit me that i've owned my debit card for three years. this gets me to think harder than the timeline meme..
i first got the debit card so as to facilitate online shopping. well, mainly i just purchase tickets online. i've also bought some stuff off ebay in the past five years. oh, and i've used it at pubs. it's just not very glam to whip out a atm card at night spots. and since i'm not particularly fond of carrying too much cash on me..
i've really not used the card a lot. but it's given me quite a lot of convenience. and it's actually cheaper sometimes to purchase online. (yes sistic. now i know.) when i first got the card, i was kinda wondering what it would be like in 2005. and things still feel pretty much the same. which they shouldn't.
three years. what have i done in the past three years? well, i was still in college. and now, i'm not. think i'm a little jaded. a little more blase. somewhat learnt to put on a front. think my ideas about friendship has somewhat mellowed a little.
song of the moment: shuang1 xi1 dong4 wu4 by tanya chua
partly why i fell for the song is coz my newest celebrity crush is starring in the mtv! ddrrroooooolll.. ok... enough said for now..
2nd meme! timeline
another one i got from Gwen's Petty, Judgemental, Evil Thoughts
since i'm making resolutions on my birthday, why not take stock of my life on my birthday too? damnit i'm so egocentric.
Meme 2: Timeline
25 years ago: i wasn't born yet.
20 years ago: I was 4. don't have much recollection of life then.
15 Years ago:I was 9. i was in primary school. it was the year i went for the test that decided i was "gifted" and got placed in some "gifted education programme". (this might be further discussed in later blogs) it was the year i discovered the people whom i thought were my friends didn't really feel that close to me.
10 Years ago: I was 14. i was in secondary school. having a most emotionally imbalanced time (my euphemistic term). lost a good friend whom i miss dearly today. luckily i've somewhat regained some form of contact with her. if only i'd finish my letter to her.
5 years ago: I was 19. had friends that made that birthday quite unforgettable. fell for someone who either never knew i fell for him, or just decided to blatantly deny that i was treating him that differently from others.
3 years ago: I was 21. was in my second year of university. not really getting the hang of things. not making a lot of friends. losing touch with whatever little friends i have.
1 year ago: I was 23. i was reeling in from the shock that i didn't need to do internship. feeling angry that my school can't make up its freaking mind on what they want from me. liking someone but lacked the courage to even speak to him.
This year: I am 24. i'm hoping that i'll have a good year. though i'm quite aware that that is dependent on me and my actions. so i've better get off my butt.
Yesterday: had to fall asleep with the help of half a sleeping pill at 4am coz i was freaking out. managed to wash my hair before work. an achievement considering i woke up 2.5 hours before work.
Today: started with the blog before this. doing this now. have to work in less than 6 hours time. hope i can go through some of my bills before i go for bed after this.
Tomorrow: have to work at the part time job that is somewhat killing me slowly. hopefully i'll settle more of my xmas/newyear gifts. and get some reading done.
such an unexciting meme.. it's really my fault. i want to sleep and i really want to go through my bills and stuff. ah well, till the next breakdown..
thoughts upon turning 24
in another 18 hours and 53 min, i'll be officially 24. the thought brings tears to my eyes. gosh. when will i realise that i'm really somewhat a grown-up?
couldn't fall asleep last night coz i was freaking out. the thoughts that are scaring me out of my wits: my mom is not getting younger. not when her teeth are disintegrating from lack of calcium (and the lack of possibility of taking calcium supplements due to a kidney condition). my dad is not getting younger either. he gets neck aches.. back aches.. age-related things. the prospect of repaying my college fees. the act of putting MY money in a fixed deposit account in the feeble attempt to earn THAT little bit more interest from the bank. that i'm trying to weasel my way through life through two part time jobs instead of looking for something i'm really interested in. the fact that i've a gadzillion little "projects" and things that i'm starting on and not completing. that my two part time jobs are killing me coz i'm starting to dislike my jobs.
getting over a birthday never used to be so difficult. it always just seemed like another day. never could really get the big deal people make over birthdays. but then again it might be due to that my family isn't particularly passionate about birthdays. i've had had birthday cakes for me like.. less than five times in my life. if you include those that were for january babies (like those class things) ok.. maybe i have had birthday cakes (for me, and some other people) no more than ten times in my life?
i've tried to make it a big deal. but it just doesn't feel that great. nobody has really made me feel really happy on my birthday. well.. in 1999, a couple of friends really tried. there has been a couple of really great birthdays. but most of them are just another day in the year.
think that's why i try not to make a big deal out of it. coz i don't want to expect something and not get anything. coz it doesn't really feel very good.
a friend messaged me on the phone to wish me happy birthday. and even though the wishes she sent are kinda cliche. but i'm touched. coz i truly hope i'll have a good year and good things will happen to me.
think i should also make some resolutions.
question of the moment: why do people make new year resolutions (NYR)? they don't really seem to keep to them. the act of making resolutions seems so.. perfunctory. think that's why i don't really like the idea of making NYRs. but i guess it makes it easier for people to keep track and review their resolutions.
i prefer to make resolutions any time in the year. as and when i deem it appropriate. i'm not exactly very aware of things. things around me. the things i do. the things that happen to me. to people around me. i'm just, a little slow when it comes to taking note of things and responding. think i'll try to do a birthday resolution thing. i just need to be a little different from everybody else. doesn't everybody want to be an individual rather than a nameless cog?
short term resolutions:
- finish my xmas/newyear gifts (sic)
- finish my letter to s
- start AND finish my portfolio
long term resolutions:
- take longer to jump to conclusions/judgements (note the careful phrasing)
- don't bitch some much about some people.
yup. for now, these are my main concerns. gosh.. not exactly very ambitious, but let's take small steps. i may be 24, but i'm really not that aware of life. ok.
